Athens, Greece. In Olympic news today,The Americans were provisionally disqualified from the Olympic Fish Slapping event held yesterday afternoon. American Olympian George Swordfish III said he was unjustly disqualified after slapping one of the judges with a Carp. Mr. Swordfish made this comment, "I missed slapping my opponent with an unusually large Carp by 2" and mistakenly hit the judge Mr. Thurston Howell the Third." Mr. Howell is listed in fare condition with minor dorsal fin lacerations to the left cheek. The Olympic committee has tested the unusually large Carp for steroids to see if it was of regulation size. If the tests turn positive for Carp Steroids, then the committee may be inclined to reinstate the American team and they would in turn go on to the final Fish Slapping Event for the gold. The finals will be held on Wednesday afternoon. Each Olympian must slap his or her opponent with a minnow while riding a great white shark horseback. The Japanese’s are a favorite for the gold in this event.
More Fish slapping event news to follow.