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Topic: If I may aske a little favor?

  1. #1
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    West Seneca, NY

    Question If I may aske a little favor?

    A life long friend of mine who is now my partner in a venture working on our own studio, has written a country song and has posted on my website. This is his first song written ever and I would like to get some feedback if I may. I did not post a link here because none of the instruments are GPO. He had sent his song to Dave Hab in NYC who did the arrangement and instrumentation as well as a vocalist to sing the lyrics. The song is "Loving You" and can be heard under "The Music"-Mark Desidario's Music page on my website.
    No pressure to listen. Just thought I would ask people I respect who know music.

    Click on website link below.

  2. #2

    Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    Well I don't Know to much about music but I do know this sounds great .It has a good feel and good hook. I would have liked to hear the fiddle play the solo part other than that .Great job

  3. #3

    Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    Tell Mark that even though I usually break out into hives when listening to 'country', I really did enjoy this track. It's more 'country' than most new country bands out there. He did a nice job with the lyrics. I assume that the song is his work as well, just arranged by someone else?

    Great job Mark!

  4. #4
    Senior Member
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    Oct 2004

    Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    The only country song I ever got off to was "I HAVE FRIENDS IN LOW PLACES"...but this track is nice. Tell the guy he did a fine fine job.

    Paul O
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  5. #5

    Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    Quote Originally Posted by Styxx
    No pressure to listen. Just thought I would ask people I respect who know music.
    Wow! old-skool kuntry, eh? That really does surprise me.
    In this case, I agree that a more 'organic' instrument could've been a better choice for the solo.
    Maybe the country-retro approach could be a 'new' marketing angle. There must be a lot of people (still out there, feeling abandoned) who prefer this over pop-country. Might be a good void for an indie label to try to fill.
    Yeah, tell'im he did a good job.


  6. #6

    Thumbs up Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    I hope this comes off the right way, my comments are meant to be constructive.

    First, I will qualify myself. I can take country in doses. I can take bluegrass, folk, etc. all day long. I hope this explains where I am coming from as a listener. Since I am not an A1 country fan, I had my wife listen to the song. She is a country fan, though she prefers `real' country to `pop' country.

    I've combined the comments from myself and my wife.

    1) The song is very well produced. Mark has a terrific voice and someone did a terrific job recording both him and the instruments. Well done!

    2) The beginning of the song sounds like a more traditional type country tune is beginning, then a more modern voice and more modern arrangement kicks in. Some of the fiddle bends, etc. don't quite fit for me. The traditional and modern sounds need to blend better together.

    3) Both of us agree the lyrics need some work. 0ne of the reasons I like country is the singers usually come up with a new, tasty way of saying something. In Loving You the lyrics became repetative and a bit lackluster. That can be dangerous, as with love songs you can then begin to border on cheesy.

    All that being said, Mark has put together a terrific first attempt. The song is good, it could be great. The production is first rate. The singer is first rate and the idea behind the song is solid. Again, I hope the comments are taken as they are meant; an honest look with honest and constructive feedback.

    We are the music makers, we are the dreamers of dreams …
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  7. #7

    Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    Country is not my first choice of music, but as a producer/arranger at heart, I listen to a little bit of everything.

    Kinda catchy -- I agree with others here, the choice of instrument for the solo seems wrong for the tune. If it's going to be a guitar solo, it should be a tasty snappy Tele solo with a lot less overdrive, something clean and crispy, ala Vince Gill. I appreciate the tune's return to more traditional Country. These days, much of what passes for Country is really just another pop-rock tune. File this guy with people like Randy Travis and Alan Jackson.

    A good solid song, nicely recorded.


  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2003

    Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    I don't want to be the voice of the "bad cop" here,

    But that song wouldn't make it past the first screening of most publishers here in Nashville. Let me explain...

    The lyrics are absolutely to trite. LFO really summed up a lot of it, but there's not a hook (lyrically speaking) in sight. That would be the immediate cause of it getting rejected here, bar none.

    The track, though well recorded enough, sounds like a home demo. Very few publishers and producers in this town will listen past the first 10 seconds unless they're "blown away" from the get go. What most folks don't realize, is that the demos in this town sound as good, if not better, than most of the commercially released CD's. And on that demo, the programmed drums need to just be turned off. They're not helping the cause one bit.

    It's not my intention to sound gruff, I just believe in shooting straight. I personally thought melodically the chorus was strong. Pair it with a strong hook lyrically and he may have something there.

    As for the solo, he'd be better off omitting it all together. That serves no purpose in a "demonstration recording", other than to fill the ego of the player, and to waste valuable time of the publisher/producer. I know that sounds ridiculous, but it's the truth.

    For what it's worth, I made my living for 11 years producing, recording and playing on literally thousands of publisher demos here in Nashville, before being fortunate enough to move to albums full time, so I feel somewhat qualified to make the above statements, even though they're merely opinions. Opinions based on experience, but opinions none-the-less.

    I would encourage your friend to stay at this, if he has a real desire to become a decent songwriter. But there's a reason that it takes most writers years to get publishing deals, or to get their first cut. It ain't that easy to write a good song, let alone a great one.

    Just another perspective...

  9. #9

    Wink Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    Well...I write country music for a living, and I like country. That said - there are a couple of things you might want to re-think. First off, I like the song.......not a whole lot that's new, but it feels real and honest. In the 'I wish' list, I don't care for the steel part, expecially at the top. It just doesn't sound very good - like it was played by a guitar player that does a little steel on the side. If you lost that part all together, it would help. I didn't mind the overdriven guitar solo, I actually kind of liked it........but..........it's the PERFECT opportunity for a puslisher, or producer, or A&R guy, etc. to turn it off. Don't give them that opening. Make the solo a quick 1 or 2 line turnaround, then get right back into the next verse. And last, just a little lyric thing. It's the life/wife rhyme. I wish you'd change that line in the first verse, because it kills the rhyme in the chorus. The effect is 'I've already heard this before'.

    OK, I'll shut up now. Nice job.

    P.S. Wouldn't hurt to increase the tempo a tad.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    West Seneca, NY

    Re: If I may aske a little favor?

    There is nothing better than a straight shooter! Keep 'em coming. Mind you, he's not looking to be a star. Just desires the pros opinions and suggestions on how to make his songs better.
    Nothing works unless you go through the pain of trial and tribulations in this business. He's a good friend and I'm not about to give him bum advice. I'll shoot straight as well.
    Thanks for the honest professional critiques!

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