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Topic: Here are some new (jokes) for ya!

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  1. #1
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
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    West Seneca, NY
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    Talking Here are some new (jokes) for ya!

    The LAPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test.
    He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
    The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
    The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.
    The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear.
    The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!



    A solider stationed in the South Pacific wrote to his wife in the States to please send him a harmonica to occupy his free time
    and keep his mind off of the local women. The wife complied and sent the best one she could find, along with several dozen
    lesson & music books.
    Rotated back home, he rushed to their home and thru the front door. "Oh darling" he gushed, "Come here... let me look
    at you... let me hold you ! Let's have a fine dinner out, then make love all night. I've missed your lovin' so much !"
    The wife, keeping her distance, said, "All in good time lover. First, let's hear you play that harmonica."

    One more for now -

    So the new conductor addresses the orchestra. He tells them that
    things are going to change, that everyone will be expected to be
    on time and that they will work for many long hours. The timpanist,
    expressing his displeasure at the turn of events, belts out on the
    drums BOOM-BOOM- BOOM-BOOM. The conductor, whirling around
    furiously, says, "Alright, who did that?!"
    Styxx

  2. #2

    Talking Re: Here are some new (jokes) for ya!

    Sincerely,
    Falcon1


    icelandphotoblog.com
    my cafepress store
    my fine art print store
    my music store

    Please support your fellow musician from Iceland where the currency has fallen 70% against USD and 90% against EURO! Every dollar or euro counts!


  3. #3
    Senior Member
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    Oct 2004
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    Houston/Atlanta
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    145

    Re: Here are some new (jokes) for ya!

    I've nevah evah seen any limericks here !!!!sniff sniff

    "P"
    Windows XP-pro SP2, Pentium 4
    3.4 GHz, 2GB RAM
    GPO & Finale 2005b.r1
    ________________________________________________

    Music is moral law. It gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, a charm to sadness and a gaiety and life to everything. It is the essence of order and leads to all that is good, true and beautiful. -- Plato


  4. #4
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
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    Re: Here are some new (jokes) for ya!

    I Went To The Movies Tomorrow
    (Tune: My Bonnie)

    I went to the movies tomorrow.
    I took a front seat at the back
    I fell from the floor to the balcony
    And broke a front bone in my back
    I said to the lady behind me,
    “I cannot see over your hat.”
    I phoned for a taxi, and walked it
    And that’s why I never came back


    A flea and a fly in a flue
    Were caught, so what could they do?
    Said the fly, "Let us flee.""Let us fly," said the flea.
    So they flew through a flaw in the flue.
    Styxx

  5. #5
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
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    Mar 2004
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    Talking Re: Here are some new (jokes) for ya!

    A guy hears a knocking on his door. He opens it up, and no
    one is there. He looks all around and he finally sees a
    little snail sitting on the doormat. He picks it up and
    throws it across the street into a field.

    Ten years go by, and one day he hears a knocking on his
    door. He opens it up and no one is there.

    He looks all around, and he finally sees a little snail
    sitting on the doormat.

    The snail looks up and says, "What the hell was that all
    about?"
    Styxx

  6. #6

    Re: Here are some new (jokes) for ya!

    "Well, they buried old Bubba Ledbetter yesterday."

    "Oh, did Bubba die?"

    "No, but they buried him anyway. He went kicking and screaming all the way."

  7. #7

    Re: Here are some new (jokes) for ya!

    Ya got a million of em!

    Toonyfish

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