You're gonna love these -------

[Styxx]

Ads - These are real ads posted in various papers that a friend of mine sent me.

Ads: Classified as Stupid

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 YEARS OLD. HATEFUL LITTLE DOG... BITES.

FREE PUPPIES: ½ COCKER SPANIEL
1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG.

FREE PUPPIES... PART GERMAN
SHEPHERD, PART STUPID DOG.
GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED.
SPEAKS GERMAN. -- FREE.

FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG. LOOKS LIKEA RAT... BEEN OUT AWHILE...
BETTER BE A REWARD.

1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB --
$850/OFFER

SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...
ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS...

COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED...
ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.

NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED,
CALL CHUBBY.

GEORGIA PEACHES,
CALIFORNIA GROWN -
89 cents lb.

NICE PARACHUTE:
NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE.

TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR?
WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS.
STARTING PAY: $7 -- $9 PER HOUR.

EXERCISE EQUIPMENT:
QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS - $175.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
MUST SELL WASHER & DRYER $300.

ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES FOR
AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER.

OPEN HOUSE: BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON.
FREE COFFEE & DONUTS.

FOR SALE BY OWNER:
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes..
Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last month. Freaking Wife knows everything

[Jerry W.]

Styxx, you never cease to crack me up!

Thanks for sharing these and adding that smile I needed!

Jerry

[Styxx]

Jerry, I couldn't stop when I read the last one!

FOR SALE BY OWNER:
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes..
Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last month. Freaking Wife knows everything.

[Styxx]

Why are blond jokes so short? So brunettes and redheads can remember them.

[Styxx]

My wife and I went to the store last night and our 14 year old daughter tagged alone. I asked what she was doing with that open bag of M&M's and she said, "I'm taking them back!" Why I asked. She said, "they are all W's!"

[SeanHannifin]

Those were hilarious!

It reminded me of some of the stuff Jay Leno shows on "headlines" on Monday night . . .

http://www.nbc.com/nbc/The_Tonight_S...es/index.shtml