I need to make some extra cash (like who doesn't) so I can purchase everything offered here plus get in on some of the group buys plus a BRAND NEW CAR and A TRIP TO ORANGE COUNTY MEPSVILLE. So, this is what I am doing. I have four kids and I'm thinking of renting them out. They don't do anything but take up space, eat, mess up their rooms, leave stuff all over the kitchen, mess up the livink room, whine, eat, argue, hit each other, eat, get water all over the bathroom, leave towels on the floor, eat, complain, eat, sleep till 3 pm, eat, eat and eat some more, get sick and cost me doctor fees, eat, throw things at each other, eat, sleep, stay out till 4 in the morning, eat, drink all the soda pop, milk, water, beer, whiskey, wine, eat, scream at each other, watch TV all day, curl their hair for two three hours on end, eat, complain there's nothing to eat, and sleep. But wait there’s more! Rent all four now for the low rate of $29.95 per day and we’ll send you their cousins, a $49.99 value absolutely free! Take advantage of this offer using your credit card and well even through in the Grandparents as a special bonus babysitters! Yes folks, Rent Styxx kids now and have the time of your life feeding, clothing, keeping them in line, even feeding them more! Hurry, volunteers are standing by now waiting egerly to take your calls! Order in the next five minutes and well through in absolutely no obligation to you, the rest of the in-laws!
Yes folks that’s right! You get the four kids, all of their cousins, Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and the rest of the in-laws for the low price of $29.95 per day.
But WAIT! Act in the next sixty seconds and we’ll through in the dog and bird absolutely free as a second bonus offer! (Hibachi not included) But wait! Hurry to the phone with your credit card and be one of the first to order and we'll through in the X - wifes and husbands! (Frankly I would stay away from this part of the order but hey, what the heck!)
So hurry now before this amazing offer goes south for the winter!
Tax and licenses where applicable void where prohibited by law. Sorry, wife stays home with me!