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Topic: Now that I'm 40...

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  1. #1
    Moderator/Developer Brian2112's Avatar
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    Talking Now that I'm 40...

    ZEN FOR THOSE WHO TAKE LIFE TOO SERIOUSLY

    1. Save The Whales. Collect The Whole Set.

    2. A Day Without Sunshine Is Like, Night.

    3. On The Other Hand, You Have Different Fingers.

    4. I Just Got Lost In Thought. It Wasn't Familiar Territory.

    5. 42.7 Percent Of All Statistics Are Made Up On The Spot.

    6. Light Travels Faster Than Sound, Which Is Why Some People Appear
    Bright Until You Hear Them Speak.

    7. I Feel Like I'm Diagonally Parked In A Parallel Universe.

    8. Honk If You Love Peace And Quiet.

    9. Remember, Half The People You Know Are Below Average.

    10. He Who Laughs Last, Thinks Slowest.

    11. Depression Is Merely Anger Without Enthusiasm.

    12. The Early Bird May Get The Worm, But The Second Mouse Gets The
    Cheese.

    13. I Drive Way Too Fast To Worry About Cholesterol.

    14. Support Bacteria. They're The Only Culture Some People Have.

    15. Monday Is An Awful Way To Spend 1/7 Of Your Week

    16. A Clear Conscience Is Usually The Sign Of A Bad Memory.

    17. Change Is Inevitable, Except From Vending Machines.

    18. Get A New Car For Your Spouse. It'll Be A Great Trade!

    19. Plan To Be Spontaneous Tomorrow.

    20. Always Try To Be Modest, And Be Proud Of It!

    21. If You Think Nobody Cares, Try Missing A Couple Of Payments.

    22. How Many Of You Believe In Psycho-Kinesis? Raise My Hand.

    23 . Ok, So What's The Speed Of Dark?

    24. How Do You Tell When You're Out Of Invisible Ink?

    25. If Everything Seems To Be Going Well, You Have Obviously
    Overlooked Something.

    26. When Everything Is Coming Your Way, You're In The Wrong Lane.

    27. Hard Work Pays Off In The Future. Laziness Pays Off Now.

    28. Everyone Has A Photographic Memory. Some Just Do Not Have Film.

    29. If Barbie Is So Popular, Why Do You Have To Buy Her Friends?

    30. How Much Deeper Would The Ocean Be Without Sponges?

    31. Eagles May Soar, But Weasels Do Not Get Sucked Into Jet Engines.

    32. What Happens If You Get Scared Half To Death Twice?

    33. I Used To Have An Open Mind But My Brains Kept Falling Out.

    34. I Couldn't Repair Your Brakes, So I Made Your Horn Louder.

    35. Why Do Psychics Have To Ask You For Your Name?

    36. Inside Every Older Person Is A Younger Person Wondering What
    Happened.



    "So what if some parts of life are a crap shoot? Get out there and shoot the crap." -- Neil Peart
    Hint:1.6180339887498948482 Φ

  2. #2

    Re: Now that I'm 40...

    Brian,

    That was totally brilliant
    Regards
    Mrs_N
    www.michcards.com

  3. #3
    Moderator
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    Re: Now that I'm 40...

    Brian,

    With Zen like that, you'll live for many for years!

  4. #4
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
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    Thumbs up Re: Now that I'm 40...

    Excellent but I still want to know WHY there is only ONE FRIDAY in a week!
    Styxx

  5. #5
    Senior Member rwayland's Avatar
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    California Redwoods
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    Re: Now that I'm 40...

    Quote Originally Posted by Styxx
    Excellent but I still want to know WHY there is only ONE FRIDAY in a week!
    Well, all you youngsters out there, Styxx, Brian, et al., my weeks all have7 holidays.

    Richard

  6. #6

    Re: Now that I'm 40...

    Quote Originally Posted by rwayland
    Well, all you youngsters out there, Styxx, Brian, et al., my weeks all have7 holidays.

    Richard
    ...cool!

    ;-)
    jim

    Jim Jarnagin - no not THAT Jim Jarnagin, the other one.

  7. #7

    Re: Now that I'm 40...

    Happy B-Day B Man. I had a horror day with the horse man. I'll give ya a buzz on Sunday.

    Love,
    Ged
    Bela D Media | www.BelaDMedia.com

  8. #8

    Re: Now that I'm 40...

    Hilarious stuff!
    Sean Patrick Hannifin
    My MP3s | My Melody Generator | my album
    "serious music" ... as if the rest of us are just kidding

  9. #9

    Re: Now that I'm 40...

    Great list...
    Tim

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