I just realized (no big deal) the 11 of this month was my two year anniversary on this forum. Time for an anniversary joke;
On their 25th anniversary, a husband took his wife to dinner. Their teenage daughters said they'd have dessert waiting for them when they returned. After returning home, the couple saw that the dining room table was beautifully set with china, crystal and candles. There was a note that read: "Your dessert is in the refrigerator. We are staying with friends, so go ahead and do something we wouldn't do!"
"I suppose," the husband responded, "we could vacuum . . ."
The preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he preached, he moved briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. Then he moved to one side, getting wound up in the cord and nearly tripping before jerking it again.
After several circles and jerks, a little girl in the third pew leaned toward her mother and whispered, "If he gets loose, will he hurt us?"
And in honor of all my PC predicaments;
Customer: "I'm having a problem installing your software. I've got a fairly old computer, and when I type 'INSTALL', all it says is 'Bad command or file name'."
Tech Support: "Ok, check the directory of the A: drive-go to A:> \ and type 'dir'."
Customer reads off a list of file names, including 'INSTALL.EXE'.
Tech Support: "All right, the correct file is there. Type 'INSTALL' again."
Customer: "Ok." (pause) "Still says 'Bad command or file name'."
Tech Support: "Hmmm. The file's there in the correct place-it can't help but do something. Are you sure you're typing I-N-S-T-A-L-L and hitting the Enter key?"
Customer: "Yes, let me try it again." (pause) "Nope, still 'Bad command or file name'."
Tech Support: (now really confused) "Are you sure you're typing I-N-S-T-A-L-L and hitting the key that says 'Enter'?"
Customer: "Well, yeah. Although my 'N' key is stuck, so I'm using the 'M' key...does that matter?