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Topic: OT - I know I need this!

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  1. #1
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
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    Talking OT - I know I need this!

    I thought this may help brighten your day as it has mine earlier.

    During this troubled time in our world I feel it imperative that we all take a break and give our brains a little vacation from all the worries and uncertainties we face. And brother ... I'm not immune. (What did he say?)

    So buck up and stuff this in your toyky! Nuk, nuk, nuk!

    Thanksgiving Divorce


    A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day
    before Thanksgiving and
    says,' I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell
    you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of
    misery is enough.

    'Pop, what are you talking about?' the son
    screams.

    We can't stand the sight of each other any
    longer,' the father says.
    'We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of
    talking about this, so you call your
    sister in Chicago and tell her.'

    Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the
    phone. 'Like heck they're
    getting divorced,' she shouts, 'I'll take
    care of this,'

    She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her
    father, 'You are NOT getting
    divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get
    there. I'm calling my brother
    back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until
    then, don't do a thing, DO YOU
    HEAR ME?' and hangs up.

    The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife.
    'Okay,' he says,'they're coming for
    Thanksgiving and paying their own way!'

  2. #2
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
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    Re: OT - I know I need this!

    'Twas the night of Thanksgiving,
    but I just couldn't sleep...
    I tried counting backwards,
    I tried counting sheep.
    The leftovers beckoned...the dark meat and white,
    but I fought the temptation with all of my might.
    Tossing and turning with anticipation,
    the thought of a snack became infatuation.
    So, I raced to the kitchen, flung open the door
    and gazed at the fridge, full of goodies galore.
    I gobbled up turkey and buttered potatoes,
    stuffing with gravy, green beans and tomatoes.
    I felt myself swelling so plump and so round,
    till all of a sudden, I rose off the ground.
    I crashed through the ceiling, floating into the sky
    with a mouthful of pudding and a handful of pie
    But, I managed to yell as I soared past the trees...
    Happy eating to all -- pass the cranberries, please.

  3. #3

    Re: OT - I know I need this!

    Quote Originally Posted by styxx
    the old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife.
    'okay,' he says,'they're coming for
    thanksgiving and paying their own way!'
    ha ha ha ha ha !

  4. #4

    Re: OT - I know I need this!

    George Carlin on "Thanksgiving":

    In the history of America, nobody has ever made love Thanksgiving night.

    ("I'm stuffed - get away from me"!)

  5. #5

    Re: OT - I know I need this!

    Coooooool!
    "Music is the shorthand of emotion." Leo Tolstoy

    Listen to me, tuning my triangle http://www.box.net/shared/ae822u6r3i

  6. #6
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
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    Re: OT - I know I need this!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ernstinen View Post
    YOU GUYS ARE KILLING ME --- OUCH! STOP IT!

    Ern (with 2 broken ribs, and laughing hurts!)

    OT from the Thanksgiving theme:

    "I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland."

    Woody Allen



    **************************************

    Back to Thanksgiving: My wife and I are driving from L.A. to Tucson AZ. Once I get into 6th gear, I'll be O.K., as long I don't have to parallel park! Ouch! --- Broken ribs are no laughing matter.
    Ribs! My wife cooked up some "spare" ribs ya want a couple? No, really ... hope you mend fast and get back to health soon. Ribs ... sheeesh!

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