Here are some high-class Shakespearean insults
that you can hurl at your enemies (and people
who drive ten miles per hour in the passing lane).
Thou ruttish, hasty-witted hedge-pig!
Thou clouted, pox-marked mumble-news!
Thou paunchy, knotty-pated horn-beast!
Thou droning, flap-mouthed bum-bailey!
Thou mammering, pottle-deep barnacle!
Thou wayward, ill-breeding wagtail!
Thou spiffering, beef-witted clotpole!
Thou lumpish, knotty-pated pumpion!
Thou yeasty, dread-bolted bladder!
Thou errant, guts-griping fustilarian!
Thou roguish, motley-minded canker-blossom!
Thou spongy, rude-growing flax-wench!
Thou loggerheaded, dread-bolted miscreant!
Thou pribbling, toad-spotted varlet!
Thou vain, milk-livered ratsbane!
Thou driveling, pox-marked measle!
Thou weedy, shard-borne maggot-pie!
Thou currish, onion-eyed lewdster!
Thou surly, weather-bitten lout!
Thou mewish, clay-brained bum-bailey!