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Topic: How to Fix Any Computer

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  1. #1

    How to Fix Any Computer

    In theory there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice there is.

    http://reberclark.blogspot.com http://reberclark.bandcamp.com http://www.youtube.com/reberclark

  2. #2
    Senior Member Styxx's Avatar
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    Re: How to Fix Any Computer

    May I suggest a BFH and if that don't woik, a BFSH!
    Styxx

  3. #3

    Re: How to Fix Any Computer

    In theory there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice there is.

    http://reberclark.blogspot.com http://reberclark.bandcamp.com http://www.youtube.com/reberclark

  4. #4

    Re: How to Fix Any Computer

    ROFLMAO!!!

    Very, very funny! LOL!
    Music and humor are healthy for the soul.

  5. #5

    Re: How to Fix Any Computer

    At a computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

    In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release (by Mr. Welch himself) stating:


    If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

    1. For no reason at all, your car would crash twice a day.

    2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a new car.

    3. Occasionally, executing a manoeuver such as a left-turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, and you would have to reinstall the engine.

    4. When your car died on the freeway for no reason, you would just accept this, restart and drive on.

    5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought 'Car95' or 'CarNT', and then added more seats.

    6. Apple would make a car powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would run on only five per cent of the roads.

    7. Oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single 'general car default' warning light.

    8. New seats would force every-one to have the same size butt.

    9. The airbag would say 'Are you sure?' before going off.

    10. Occasionally, for no reason, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grabbed the radio antenna.

    11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of road maps from Rand-McNally (a subsidiary of GM), even though they neither need them nor want them. Trying to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50 per cent or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.

    12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

    13. You would press the 'start' button to shut off the engine.

  6. #6
    Senior Member caher's Avatar
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    Jan 2006
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    Connecticut
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    146

    Re: How to Fix Any Computer

    Ah, percussive maintenance! Maybe we should sample that and make a new virtual instrument.

  7. #7

    Re: How to Fix Any Computer

    Quote Originally Posted by caher View Post
    Ah, percussive maintenance! Maybe we should sample that and make a new virtual instrument.
    "Percussive Maintenance" - a great term!
    In theory there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice there is.

    http://reberclark.blogspot.com http://reberclark.bandcamp.com http://www.youtube.com/reberclark

  8. #8
    Senior Member Silh's Avatar
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    Sep 2010
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    Alberta, Canada
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    355

    Re: How to Fix Any Computer

    Ahh, Linux... Been running it for 15-ish years (let's just say there are more Linux than Windows computers in my house...) Sadly, the state of music production in Linux is not so great...
    -- Matt Wong

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